UNKNOWN

We all fear the unknown.

We all fear the reality of uncertainties, so much so, that when we’re forced to face them we create an explanation that allows us to cope. We fabricate reality to ease the pain of remaining in the unknown. We concoct all sorts of hypothesis to explain natural disasters, war, famine, poverty, and all methods of anguish. In fact, the more personal the pain, the more we feel compelled to explain. It is simply human nature. If I hear of children dying of hunger in Africa, I hate it, and I want to explain it, but when its MY child I MUST explain it.

A few months ago I was reading this article on Google news about a little 2 year-old that had waited in the ER at a hospital in California. During the wait to see a physician, her condition worsened. The mom and dad learned that she had gotten so bad that they now had to amputate both her feet and one of her hands to save her; and all because of a simple error.

I was livid – at God – how could He allow this?! It simply was not fair – she’s only 2 (I have a 2 year-old) and now for no good reason she’ll have to live this life with a lot of pain. I wanted an answer. I wanted God to either not exist; or to show up, face to face and tell me just how He could allow such pain in the world. Then it occurred to me that I cared. The person I was 5 years ago would have read that story, felt bad, and offered up a verse to allow it to pass by. I would have crafted an explanation that allowed me to cope with such tragedy. The person  I want to become is one of much greater compassion, one who cries when he hears that sort of story. Maybe that’s the point of remaining in the unknown, it humbles us and softens our heart to care.

Our desire to understand forces us to reduce reality into something more manageable, and it makes the pain subside.

For now.

It’s unsettling really, and we cannot exist in such a volatile state for too long – we quickly assert that which is known. When we refuse to enter into the unknown and choose instead the calming reassurance of our explanations (“his death was God’s will” or “she’ll find justice in the next life”) we miss communing with the Creator of the Universe who is there with us in our pain. Rationalizing leaves us incredibly unsatisfied. Our souls scream from within yearning that we not squash the pain of the unanswerable. Remain in the unknown and you will discover something of great beauty. You will be in the presence of the Divine, and be changed in the process.

Pirate Christianity

Barbosa: First of all, Miss Turner, returning you to shore was never part of our agreement. Second, you are not a pirate, so the Pirate’s Code does not apply. And third, the Pirate’s Code is more of a set of what you’d call ‘guidelines’ than actual rules. Welcome aboard the Black Pearl, Miss Turner.

I’m one of those guys that just naturally remembers movie quotes. Typically I quote them out of context and confuse my friends or just annoy my wife. This line from Pirates of the Caribbean has stuck with me through the years. I view it as a challenge to how I live out my walk with Jesus.

Christianity is more what you’d call ‘guidelines’ than actual rules.

Allow me to insert my disclaimers here. I’m not a theologian, and don’t pretend to be. For those of you with well-formed ecclesiologies I am not suggesting that Christianity is a situational ethic, or that there are not standards. I am suggesting; however, that when simply viewed as a list of rules to follow you remove the heart. Compliance is not the goal – transformation is.

We see this modeled best in Jesus, he transcended the rules. He was a rule-breaker but not just to rebel or break the rules. Jesus healed on the sabbath, (Mark 3) and broke the law – in order to fulfill it.

I am obsessed with the rules – I want to learn them that I might apply them and thus be “safe”. Guidelines are much more dangerous. A set of guidelines requires I internalize the circumstance and my character is tested. Guidelines provide the intent of a matter to allow the individual to wisely (or unwisely) apply to each decision.

As I raise my daughters I am hoping to cultivate in them a rich soil of character. When I focus on the harvest and not the soil I miss the intent of discipleship. I have simply raised compliant children that are dependent upon me to tell them what to do, and they have not truly “become” transformed. Mark tells it this way, “the seed planted in the good earth represents those who hear the Word, embrace it, and produce a harvest beyond their wildest dreams.” It has been ingested and begun the process of internal redemption.

As you implement a discipleship culture at your church how can the concept of “Pirate Christianity” be useful?

Why your church should stop having events – part III

So you’ve decided to host an event? (Let’s assume for now that you’ve read my last two posts on why you shouldn’t.) The question is “how do I maximize the impact of my event?”

First, I’ll assume you’ve invited only the coolest kids, and you’ve got some incredible, life-changing activities planned. In other words, this post will be directed to only sweetest events, not the average church backyard BBQ.

Now, I prefer the backyard BBQ, because most events I attend I’m not interested in the polished and perfected church-sponsored production. (I understand that you love your smoke machine and are simply looking for more venues in which to use it.)

Typically churches host larger events in the hopes that it will introduce new people to the community and some will want to engage at deeper levels. Here are 3 things to consider that will increase your effectiveness.

1. Who owns it? To ensure that people are followed up with and don’t just fall through the cracks will require intentionality and leadership. Be certain everyone knows who is the single point of contact for anything related to the event. Remember, leaders can delegate, never abdicate.

2. Equipped. Invest in your leaders. Spend time with them, know the names of their kids, and catch up on their lives… just not at the event. Remember it’s not about YOU. The goal is to make people feel welcome, and not like they’ve walked into a click. The best way to accomplish this is to focus upon being interested, not interesting. Be sure that before the event has happened you’ve equipped your leaders to be others-focused.

3. Follow up: timely, meaningful, personal. While the staff can be the ones to help organize and direct, they should not be the only ones completing follow up. The system you use for follow up should allow your staff (both paid & unpaid) to be timely & personal in their response and invite the new guest to something meaningful as a next step. Remember, the best systems are the ones that don’t feel like systems at all.

BONUS.

4. FUN. Please, please, please, if you do nothing else, just make sure its fun and not lame.

How else can we increase the impact & effectiveness of the events the church hosts?

Why your church should stop having events – part II

Perhaps shifting from a calendar that’s so full there’s not an open day to not having ANY events is a bit radical. The goal of the first post was to be radical and get churches to ask “why are we hosting this event?” Why do we need to put together a Christian version of a Superbowl party and try to drag our friends to it? Why not go and BE the church in the living rooms and sports bars where people are already meeting? Instead of tiring our staff to produce incredible events and then try to justify those events by promoting them, charging for them, and hoping it all works; why not equip people to live out the mission of Jesus wherever they find themselves?

With increased clarity and quality communication comes increased impact.

Before you host that event first consider…

… what else have we asked our people to participate in this week?

… how will this impact their ability to have quality family time?

… what is the opportunity cost? (what will our staff NOT be doing in order to produce this event)

Consider for a moment the story of LifeBridge Church in Longmont, CO. Pastor Rick Rusaw tells the story in the book, The Externally Focused Church, here are some excerpts.

In the 1990s the main strategy for outreach at LifeBridge was creating large special events, especially surrounding Christmas and Easter, to attract visitors. A lot of time and money were poured into these special events, and thousands of people visited the church because of them.

… But, for a number of reasons, we decided to make a change. We had a change in the ministry staff that led the event, it took a lot of money to produce, it required a great deal of our staff resources, and ultimately, it was internally focused.

… To redirect our focus more intentionally outward meant a change. It meant looking for new ways to get to know our community and be of service.

What unfolds next are multiple stories about a church community that began to enter deeper relationships with the community around them, invite their members to meet the needs they discovered by going out and being Jesus to those that needed some good news. I LOVE this story, and to fully appreciate it you need to hear the entire story, I suggest buying the book if you are truly wrestling with these questions.

What is the church’s role to equip people? (GO & BE vs. COME & SEE)

Why your church should stop having events

Why do you host events? Maybe you’re a pastor who is like many pastors I’ve met. You started out with a vision and a passion to reach people in your city with the Good News. You decide you’re not going to be anything like “those stuck-up churches” in town… after all, you’re young, hip and open even to people who want to wear jeans to a casual service.

And guess what, it works. You’re a charismatic speaker, so you begin to draw a crowd. God may even bless your congregation with an edgy faux-hawk wearing worship pastor. You’re set! The services flourish, and then you think – “hey, maybe we should do something with all these people that keep showing up?”

This is when the critical mistake is made.

You ask people what they want to do. You hear responses such as “we need to do something for married people, lets host a marriage retreat” or “all these single people need a better option than the bar scene” and thus you begin various and multiple ministries to serve all those needs. The issue is that the needs are relentless and the calendar quickly becomes cluttered. Focus is lost, and impact dissipates.

We love being busy in America, it makes us feel important.

The question we must ask ourselves is, are all of these events leading people towards deeper relationships with God and others? Is real life transformation happening through your events strategy (do you know, or simply “think so”)?

In what ways could a pastor bring clarity to vision without excluding people? How would you help the church that serves the idol of busyness?

why i’m afraid of poor people

I would love it if God would just make me a millionaire and I could eliminate poverty. Ok, perhaps a multi-multi billionaire, it’s a big problem. Of course, after my cut there may not be that much left. Scratch that.

So here’s the issue. I’m learning a lot right now about the problem of poverty. What I have begun to realize is that poverty is a very complex issue, and material solutions don’t even begin to comprehend the problem. I’m grateful to Bill at Pantano for giving me a copy of When Helping Hurts, which has helped me redefine “poverty.” (see the poverty wheel by Compassion)

Pantano partners with an amazing organization, the Open Table. (no, not the guys that do dinner reservations) The Open Table understands the relational bankruptcy that people in poverty face. They assemble “tables” to partner WITH an individual to develop a life plan that considers multiple aspects of their life. What I love the most about the structure that Open Table provides to engage the poverty issue is that is begins to bridge the relational voids. The truth is that I’m mostly afraid of poor people, and I don’t know if I want relationship. What if they need something I’m unable or unwilling to provide? What if they’re weird? Is the person going to smell? Be an alcoholic? Drugs? Is it going to be one-way relationally? Will they drain me and demand all my time? The structure of a Table allows people to begin to build a relationship, and thus push past all of the assumptions. It’s important we understand the relational bankruptcy that people in poverty face and not simply solve from a material understanding. A Table structure works through relationship and creates momentum in all areas of poverty.

As I begin to redefine the problem I can begin to accept the overwhelming nature of the issue and ask solid questions such as “what is God asking for my family’s role to be in alleviating poverty?” As I begin to ask I begin to view poverty as something I’m supposed to care about. I can no longer be satisfied in my little world and go on ignoring people in need. My world must be disrupted. And that’s why I’m afraid.

What is God showing you about your fears in owning the issue of poverty alleviation?

Why Millinneals resist Institutional Church

Amongst Millennials (1980-2000) there is a movement towards organic church. This desire tends to push back on anything that is highly structured. Institutional church may feel too polished, packaged and marked to these young people, and thus it is not authentic. As a result there has been a surge in models of church planting and growth that value “organic” methods of organization. While I highly value authenticity, I would propose that God is BOTH organic & systematic. We should not build assembly lines in our churches, yet we need to not resist leadership in all it’s forms. (Hey, I’m Gen-X so I get to play the line between Boomers & Millennials)

Last summer I planted my first garden. My only experience comes from what I read in Bible stories and imagined what gardening must be like. I had visions of a man with a large burlap sack walking through a field and scattering seed as he went. What I learned is that when you don’t plant with intention and design you grow a lot of milkweed.

the organic system

What do people really want when they say “organic”?(freedom to move, not so serious, doesn’t choke the life out of things, artistic, not constrained)

An Organic System is when we listen to what God is already doing and respond intentionally in alignment with His will. We must learn to invite people into areas aligned with their passion and abilities. Like a good gardener we have taken the time to understand our environment and what is likely to grow. We must recognize the resources God has placed in our churches and we must walk with people in a manner that is personal and intentionally cultivated.

What role do you believe leadership and structure play in supporting an “organic” approach?

The Problem with Ministry

It’s time we change our preposition. Ministry is supposed to be something we do WITH others, not TO others. For some divine reason our God, who does not need our help has chosen to invite us into His plan. He has given us each gifts, passions, and resources to accomplish His acts of love and redemption and justice in the world. When “we the church” begin to analyze the methods (our systems & processes) of ministry we begin to identify gaps. As we seek to improve the efficiencies of those methods we are faced with a slippery slope. Our desire to become efficient can confuse us as to why we’ve set out to help others in the first place. As we become focused upon the results and the numbers we devolve into an assembly line version of ministry because we view people as the objects of our good works, rather than partners in becoming disciples of Christ. What we become is evidenced in the language.

A ministry…

TO is void of relationship               WITH breaks down the barriers.

TO is comfortable                             WITH is scary

TO is managing data                       WITH is involving people

TO is aseptic                                       WITH is messy.

who do you need to invite?

Shifting your perspective will begin to highlight the gaps and allow you to notice where you’ve unnecessarily taken on a burden that you could have invited others into partnership.

Where does your church need to replace the preposition and transform their approach to ministry? 

Why confrontation is healthy

It’s simply human nature to avoid pain. We experience a negative consequence and our brains tell us to avoid doing that behavior again. We all tend to avoid conflict to self-protect, in order to survive. This behavior will in the long run end up costing the individual and those closest to them more than if they had directly engaged the difficult situation. The challenge is often that no one has shown them how to have healthy conflict before. People with this view of life likely grew up in a home where mom and dad had a philosophy of “let’s not fight in front of the kids.” Thus the kids never learned how to deal with conflict. Conflict became something you ignored and just hoped would go away. While we all may naturally have the “fight or flight” instinct, there is a better alternative. It is possible to engage a conflict with positive results.

Create a culture of questions. What is your culture? Do you tell your staff you’ve got an “open door” policy, but project such an unapproachable persona that no one would dare disagree with you? Do you simply follow the most vocal, or the best debater? Or perhaps you stonewall those who disagree with you, giving them the ol’ silent treatment? Instead cultivate an environment where questions are welcomed. Provide the guidelines on how to respectfully challenge an idea, rather than fearfully “lobbing one” over the wall and cringing for impact. By providing the environment and the time in a meeting for questions or alternative viewpoints people will feel heard. They will know that you want them to bring their very best to the team each day.

Set the expectations. It is the role of the leader to steward the culture of the team in a manner that provides a space for disagreement? The tendency when someone disagrees with us is to become defensive -  we view their questions as a personal attack, rather than simply seeking understanding. Learning how to disagree without reacting with anger or offense is a key skill required in building a healthy team. Disagreement does not undermine your authority. If developed effectively, the insights of others can be incredible resources to clue you in to blind spots. When leading a team you need to clearly communicate expectations of how the team will handle conflict. Let people know that respecting everyone is a requirement to be on this team, it will produce an environment of trust.

Communicate the action items. Even those with the best memories forget. Additionally, we all have our perceptions of what occurred during a meeting. Three people can all attend the same meeting and walk away with very different assumptions of what transpired. Do not leave it to chance. It’s important to take a few minutes at the end of the meeting to summarize what was accomplished so everyone has the opportunity to feel they’ve been heard. Then to be sure everyone is clear on the expectations and responsibilities, send a written summary and action items list to all in attendance.

Drift happens

Have you ever had one of those experiences of needing to transport a large group of friends to the same location? So you decide to carpool, but not everyone can fit into the worship pastor’s VW Jetta, so you decide to just caravan. Now you know the area best, so you decide to lead the way. The challenge is that once you merge onto the highway and get about 4-5 miles down the road, you are so “in the zone” that when you finally look in the rear-view mirror, you discover no one is behind you.

Where’d all the people go?

Sometime church leadership is a little like this. When you were in the pre-launch phase there was a lot of excitement; there was so much you had to do. New people were coming to know Christ, others were getting excited about the vision, and many were experiencing true community – you know, the ACT2 kind. Only now you’re 5 years into it, and staff meetings are more about reviewing the list of all the projects you’re behind on, rather than sharing stories about the miracles God is unfolding in your growing congregation.

This is why the Connected Church Conference is different. This year we’re offering ticket sales in group packages. Certainly you could spend the money and come on your own, but would you want to?

Our intention for #CCBC3 in 2011 is that you would bring your team and find a time to be refreshed & be inspired to the root of why you launched in the first place. Perhaps it’s time to pull the car over to the side of the road so everyone else can catch up and you can confirm that you all still want to head to the same place.

In the course of the conference workshop and breakouts, you’ll have time reserved for you to build an action plan to make an impact on one specific challenge you’ve been facing. You’ll pray together, and regain some of the passion you once had when you first launched (or joined the staff).